Can you hear my now? Update....Test Results

For those who have followed along on my newest journey, I found out the other day that I have a very significant hearing loss. I am very glad to finally know, and enter into the world of hearing. At least as well as I am going to hear.

First things first, I had written that they needed to rule out other complications before they could just call it a hearing loss.

On Friday morning, bright and early, I was laying in an MRI machine while they looked for a tumor on my brain. My doctor told me she felt quite confident that I did not have a tumor, however, she said it was imperative that they rule that out. So from Wednesday to Friday, my emotions were running high, wondering if I had just a hearing loss.

Friday afternoon, we found out that I do not have a tumor.

I simply have a hearing loss.

I have been celebrating with family ever since we found out.

Finding out I have a hearing loss was new, but it is all I know. Nothing changed there.

Learning that this is all it is, is exhilarating.

How could that be that I did not know my whole life that I have a hearing loss? Believe it or not, it is not all that surprising.

My family and I have spent countless hours putting pieces together. I am 50 years old, and we only just learned that I have a very significant hearing loss.

I have never heard how others hear, and I still hear some tones. So this has been my normal for as long as I can remember.

The tones I hear the best put my loss in mild/moderate hearing loss category. Those are my low tones. So if people had low tones, I mildly or moderately could not hear you.

As the pitch increases I am all the way up having severe hearing loss.

I do not have any damage to my ears either. Which makes the professionals surmise that it is most likely that I was born this way.

As we have pieced this together, so many things now make sense.

People would tell me I talk too loud. So I adjusted and spoke quieter. It all sounded the same to me, but I could feel in my throat that it was not as loud.

I would adjust my voice, depending on what someone told me. Usually family members. Sometimes friends, when I was little. Like, "Mom, you talk too loud." Or "Diane, I cannot hear you, can you please speak up." It all sounded the same to me, so I thought it was their issue but I "adjusted" accordingly.

My husband and I reminisced this weekend how when I was 18 I told him I would be afraid if something happened to me, because my voice does not travel very far, and I worried nobody would hear me scream. In my world, it did not sound loud enough for others to hear.

When I was a little girl, I had some kids tease me that I was too loud. So then I adjusted, the best a little kid can, and made my voice what I thought was less loud. I did not hear that I was too loud again that year, so I figured I must been more in control of my behaviors. I did not equate it to a hearing loss, because remember, my voice was my voice, was my voice. I felt it was more closely related to behaviors. And people reacted to me that way too. So I just did my best all my life to try to adjust my voice to what the feedback was by those around me.

Another instance was that I thought I could hear people better when they look at me. Depending on the person, I had mastered the art of lip reading, and my brain told me I was hearing them. I put their tones I could hear, together what I saw them say, and pieced together what they were saying.

I did miss a lot of what others said, which all of us are piecing together. Times when others thought I did not remember the details were actually more than likely times when I did not ever once for a second hear that detail.

And as I said the other day, I loved speaker phones for ever, because before speaker phones, I just was not as impressed by Alexander Graham Bell as the rest of the world was. I used phones, but everyone sounded very muffled or like they were mumbling.

And let's face it, the commercials convinced me it was a technology issue. "Can you hear me now?" was a tag line that proved to me that not all telephones or providers were providing clear reception. When speaker phones came out, I was super excited, because this was way better than the technology that we were all already using.

So I accommodated all along the way. Not realizing I was doing this all along the way.

On Monday I will be getting fitted for my new hearing aids. I think it will take a week to get them. If my hearing is going to be anything like it was the day I heard the audiologist when I got my diagnosis, I think I will fall over. They said to expect it to be.

For the first time in my life, as much is physically possible with modern technology, I will hear what all of the people in my life REALLY sound like.

For the first time in my life, I will hear what my husband and my children really sound like.

It takes my breath away.

I am excited to hear you world!

Thank you for all of the support and love you all have shown us as I enter into the world of hearing.

It truly is going to be a journey, that I promise I will share with you as I go.

This entry was posted on Saturday, June 4, 2016. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response.

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